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Respect isnt a buzzword or a line in a mission statement. Its a strategy, and one that I used to build an empire during my time leading Syms, the first truly off-price retail chain in America. When my father, Sy Syms, and I grew our business from a single store in lower Manhattan into a 50-location national retailer, we werent just selling clothes. We were proving that dignity could be a competitive advantage. We respected customers’ time by color-coding tags by size and keeping every store layout identical. Walk into one Syms, and youd know how to navigate them all. We respected their intelligence by refusing to hard-sell. Our employees werent sales associatesthey were educators, trained to answer questions about fiber content, tailoring, and fit. We respected their wallets with no-frills décor that kept prices down. It wasnt fancy. But it worked. Because people remember how you make them feeland respect is unforgettable. Below I’ve outlined how you can infuse respect into every aspect of your business. The 10 (or 13) Commandments of Customer Respect As the company scaled, we codified these behaviors into what became known internally as our Ten Commandments of customer service. These werent optional. They were embedded into onboarding, posted in every break room, and upheld from the stockroom to the C-suite. Here they are: 1. Treat every customer with the respect you yourself expect to receive. They are the reason we stay in business. (Note: Respect is rule Number One, sort of like the First Amendment.) 2. Greet each customer with a smile, direct eye contact, and a good morning, afternoon or evening as soon as they enter our store. Your expression, body stance, and tone of voice should say, Welcome, Were Glad You Came To Shop. 3. Determine the customers need once youve said hello. 4. If a customer requests a certain item or specific size, never point or give directions; escort the customer to the proper area. 5. Always look up while doing stock to say hello to shoppers in your area. Smile to show that you are available for any questions they might have. 6. Be aware of suggestive selling opportunities. Let the customer know we have tops to match the bottoms theyve selected. Escort them to the tops and excuse yourself to let them look through the merchandise. 7. Be knowledgeable about the various brand names, fiber contents, and sizes throughout your area. 8. Remember to remain cool and levelheaded. Be extra kind and respectful to customers. Management presence is of the utmost importance. 9. Help a customer with a zipper or the buttons on the back of an outfit in the dressing room. 10. Be honest to customers. If the suit doesnt fit, suggest another manufacturer or size; dont tell the customer what you think he/she wants to hear. Id add only a few more: 11. Be aware of the competition, including online sellers, but never disparage anyone else. 12. People are always in a hurry. Save them as much time as possible with clear and relevant advice that helps them find what they want quickly. 13. When in doubt, see rule 1. But respect isnt just a checklist. Its a mindset. And in one moment, that mindset saved a store opening from disaster. When Permits Fell Through, a Car Hood Became Our Checkout Counter One of our new suburban New Jersey locations was set to open on a Saturday morning. Hundreds of people lined up outside. But due to a last-minute paperwork error, we didnt have the permits to legally open our doors. Most companies would have sent everyone home. We didnt. My father and I grabbed a pen and set up shop on the hood of a car in the parking lot. We handwrote $10 discount coupons for every person who showed up. That gesture turned disappointment into goodwilland when we officially opened the following week, the turnout shattered expectations. That wasnt marketing. It was respect in action. How I Interviewed for Respect And Screened for Selfishness Respect also defined our hiring practices. During interviews, Id ask each candidate: What eight questions do you need answered before deciding to work here? I wasnt just listening to the questions. I was evaluating why they asked them. If more than one question was self-servingHow soon can I be promoted? or Do you reward employees when they get compliment letters?they didnt get a callback. Sometimes even one red flag was enough. The best candidates showed curiosity, not entitlement. They asked about our values, our stores, our customers. And the biggest red flag? Never visiting a store before applying. To me, that showed a fundamental lack of respect for the brand, the customer, and the opportunity. Hiring for respect helped us build a workforce that embodied our culture from day one. When Respect Isnt Returned Respect cant be a one-way street. And not every boardroom I entered treated me the way I treated them. As the youngest woman to ever lead an NYSE-listed company, I spent many years as the only female voice at the table. During Syms reorganization, I negotiated with hedge funds that spoke over me, questioned my competence, and ignored my insight. Was it ageism? Sexism? Maybe both. But I kept showing up with respect. Not because I felt it, but because I believed in it. It became a strategy to disarm ego and move the conversation forward. I refused to mirror their dismissiveness, because doing so would only validate it. Eventually, that approach gave me leverage. You can’t lead people you look down on. And you can’t win partnerships without mutual respect. Why Respect Still Matters Todays business leaders spend a lot of time chasing engagement, culture, and retention. Heres a shortcut: build respect into everything. From how you onboard to how you communicate. From how you acknowledge work to how you handle missteps. From how you treat employees behind closed doors to how you show up in the market. Respect isnt “soft.” It drives loyalty, innovation, and performance. Companies that lack it bleed talent and trust. Companies that live it turn employees into advocates and customers into evangelists. And most importantly: respect scales. It works whether youre running one store or 50. Whether youre selling suits or software. As leaders, we often search for the next breakthrough. But sometimes the most powerful ideas are the oldest ones. Respect is one of them.
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E-Commerce
As I illustrate in my forthcoming book, we live in an age of authenticity worship. From corporate mission statements urging employees to bring their whole selves to work to self-help gurus insisting that being real is the only path to fulfillment, weve elevated authenticity to near-spiritual status. But our obsession has a curious twist: we tend to grant a special premium to negative authenticity. A leaders blunt criticism, antisocial rant, public sulk, or contrarian tirade is often praised as refreshingly honest, while their polite diplomacy is dismissed as fake. Somewhere along the way, we started believing that authentic displays of antisocial emotion (e.g., anger, contempt, derision) are somehow more real, and thus more valuable, than well-mannered restraint. As if telling a colleague their idea is idiotic is more admirable than smiling politely and redirecting the conversation. In reality, antagonizing people doesnt make you authentic; it just makes you antagonistic. Moreover, between fake politeness or honest rudeness, most people will typically prefer the former, especially if they are on the receiving end. Genuine social skill is not the absence of self-censorship, but rather the mastery of it. The real work of emotional intelligence, which is basically a form of social desirability or strategic self-presentation, lies in resisting the urge to broadcast every feeling and thought, especially those that would derail relationships, alienate others, or erode trust. High-stakes environments, such as boardrooms, negotiations, and crisis situations, reward those who can keep a poker face, not those who turn every meeting into an open mic night for their grievances. The EQauthenticity paradox If authenticity were the sole measure of leadership quality, then every temperamental, impulsive boss would be a management guru. Instead, such characters make toxic workers who destroy team morale and impair organizational effectiveness, not to mention harm the culture. Indeed, the data show quite clearly that emotional intelligence (EQ), the ability to recognize, regulate, and influence emotions, is one of the most consistent predictors of career success, managerial effectiveness, and leadership competence. Some unpopular news: EQ is negatively correlated with unfiltered authenticity. The leaders who score highest on EQ arent known for wearing their hearts on their sleeves, broadcasting their unsolicited political views or divisive opinions, or expecting others to tune into their feelings and put up with their emotional tantrums: instead, theyre known for playing their cards close to their chest. Like skilled poker players, they control the game by controlling their tells. Fundamentally, they dont assume that others must adjust to their feelings or moods but rather make an effort to understand and adapt to other peoples preferences, views, and emotions (as in, they dont believe they are the center of the universe, which, in normal child development patterns, humans tend to comprehend at the age of 6). The best leaders understand that the right to be yourself ends where your responsibility to others begins. Venting in public, rolling your eyes in meetings, or delivering a scathing tweetstorm about your teams shortcomings may feel cathartic, but its rarely productive. In most cases, a leader who cant filter themselves is less a truth-teller and more a low-EQ liability. Think of Winston Churchill, famous for his wartime resolvenot for publicly berating his generals. Or Angela Merkel, who built influence not through Twitter rants, but through disciplined understatement. Contrast that with the modern crop of leaders whose personal brand doubles as a rolling PR crisis, and the EQauthenticity paradox becomes painfully clear. Authenticity as a luxury good Ironically, some leaders deploy rudeness and rebellion precisely because it makes them appear authentic. Theres a certain seductive quality to the CEO who says what everyone is thinking but no one dares to say, never mind that everyone is actually just their own reflection in a $2,000 conference table. But, just like disagreeing with everyone doesnt make you right, violating social norms doesnt make you authentic, let alone creative, virtuous, or courageous. Social psychology offers a clue: norm violation by powerful people often gets reframed as charisma. When you have the status and resources to survive the fallout, you can break etiquette with impunity. Its not that youre braver than everyone else; its that youre insulated from consequences. In this sense, authenticity is less a moral virtue than a status symbol. The freedom to be unapologetically rude is a perk of the privileged elite, whose power shields them from the accountability that constrains the rest of us. For them, telling it like it is isnt a courageous act, its a performance of dominance, namely boasting or showing off for having the freedom to offend without any major consequences, and many people cheering you! Needless to say, this is a terrible model for leadership. When leaders flaunt their disregard for civility, they legitimize those behaviors in others. What begins as a performative show of realness trickles down into the culture, corroding trust, cooperation, and psychological safety. And while anger, bullying, and public belittling may unite a few sycophants, they alienate far more people than they rally. The leadership that actually works Leadership, at its core, is about uniting people toward a shared goal. History offers plenty of examples of leaders who inspired loyalty not through shock value, but through steady, respectful, and measured behavior. Jacinda Arderns calm empathy after the Christchurch mosque shootings. Barack Obamas disciplined cool in moments of crisis. Indra Nooyis blend of strategic rigor and personal warmth at PepsiCo. These leaders didnt let it all out in public, they exercised judgment over what to share, when, and how. Thats not inauthenticity; its responsibility. They understood that the role of a leader is not to model emotional indulgence, but to model emotional discipline. By contrast, the authentic tantrums of some celebrity executives resemble less a leaders rallying cry than a toddlers supermarket meltdown. If you cant imagine a behavior being effective in a kindergarten classroom, its probably not great in a company boardroom either. AsJennifer Jason Leighs character, Lorraine Lyon, alludes in one of the most iconic scenes of Fargo season 5, in which she confronts the tyrannic, megalomaniac and self-centered Sheriff Roy Tillman played by John Hamm, the only people who can rightly aspire to having absolute freedom without any responsibilities are babies. Sadly, there are many examples of adults, including those in very powerful positions, who appear to behave like babies in this precise way, but just because they may use their power and status to get away with such behaviors doesnt mean they are a role model to emulate. Warning signs If you are interested in knowing whether seemingly contrarian and nonconformist leaders are being authentic or just rude, obnoxious, or toxic, consider these five red flags: 1. Authenticity is one-directionalThey insist on radical honesty from their teams but treat dissent as betrayal. You can tell them exactly what you think, provided what you think is flattering. The moment feedback points upward, the mood shifts from openness to insubordination. True authenticity goes both ways; selective authenticity is just control in disguise. 2. The truth is always negativeTheir so-called candor has a narrow emotional range: somewhere between irritated and outraged. Praise is rare, appreciation rarer still. These leaders wear bluntness like a badge, but in reality, theyre simply defaulting to criticism because its easier than building people up. Its not that they tell it like it is, its that they only tell the parts that sting. 3. Accountability is for everyone elseWhen theyre late, its because theyre busy. When they miss a target, its because the market shifted. But when you slip up, its a character flaw, a cultural fit issue, or a sign youre not fully committed. They frame their own outbursts as passion and others as unprofessionalism. In other words, the rules are flexible, just not for you. 4. They confuse disruption with visionTheir proudest leadership moments are breaking rules, ignoring norms, or defying expectations, regardless of whether the outcome is useful. Disruption, for them, is not a strategy but an identity. The problem is that true visionaries break rules to create something better; these leaders break them because the chaos keeps them in the spotlight. 5. The audience is the pointTheir most authentic moments always seem to have a convenient audience: an all-hands meeting, a media interview, or a viral LinkedIn post. When theres no crowd, the grand moral stands tend to vanish. This isnt about honestyits about performance. Like reality TV contestants, they thrive on the optics of being real, even if the script is as calculated as any PR campaign. Weakness vs. wisdom In short, we should be careful not to confuse the absence of manners with the presence of truth. The value of authenticity isnt in broadcasting your inner monologue, its in aligning your actions with your values in a way that strengthens your relationships and your organization. A leader who controls their impulses is not being fake; theyre being strategic. A leader who spares you their worst thoughts isnt hiding the truth, theyre prioritizing the relationship over their ego. Thats not weakness; thats wisdom. So next time you see a leader praised for their refreshing honesty because theyve insulted a colleague, bullied a journalist, or turned a shareholder meeting into a personal grievance session, ask yourself: is this authenticity, or is it just power dressed up as courage? Because while anyone can be authentic, only the truly skilled know when not to be. And in leadership (as in poker) sometimes the smartest move is the one you dont show.
Category:
E-Commerce
If youre Gen Z, you probably grew up on algorithms that whisper monetize it the moment anything feels fun. The importance of personal brands is constantly drilled into you, along with a side of LinkedIn wins, Etsy grinds, and side hustle culture. If youre good at something, youre told to sell it (or at least make it go viral). Google queries for how to monetize content shot up 305% in the past month, while how to build a personal brand is up 67% year-on-year. The hustle is real. Thirty-nine percent of Gen Z have multiple jobs, while 57% admit they have cried at work, indicating signs of a generation under pressure to perform. Burnout now hits 52% of full-time workers, with stress soaring among under-30s. Ambition is colliding head-on with anxiety. But not everything you love needs a price tag, a post, or a pitch deck. So, before you spin your crochet habit into yet another revenue stream, consider these four-part lifesaving reasons not to do it. No monetization zone guards you from overworking When your hobbies become a way to make a living, youre more prone to overworking and burnout. Median side-hustle pay is just $200 a month, yet the average hustler adds 1116 extra hours every week to chase it. Gallup finds burnout risk doubles once total work tops 45 hours. Thats like playing overtime for minimum wage. Thats why its important to set boundaries when it comes to your hobby. Be deliberately unproductive with it. Journal just for the fun of it, bake without posting a picture, and paint things you dont show anyone. This reminds your brain, Hey, not everything needs to be optimized. Fun stays fun, and every new interest doesnt morph into a second shift. Keeping some work unposted decreases pressure Social media is designed to prioritize content over connection. Roughly 29% of teens feel pressure to post content that will get lots of likes, and 38% say drama on these apps overwhelms them. When this is the norm, keeping some things private can be revolutionary. Theres something magical about making something just for you or a close circle. If you need a platform for your new hobby, consider a private account or a lesser-known platform for sharing it. When you dont have a big audience watching, theres less pressure. No likes, no algorithm, no performance metrics. As a result, youll be more likely to experience the pure joy of your hobby and find out what is really exciting to make. Boredom can be a source of inspiration Heres a plot twist: doing something with no goal can unlock more creativity than grinding ever will. A University of Central Lancashire experiment had volunteers copy phone numbers (mind-numbing stuff) before tackling idea tasks. The bored group produced significantly more original solutions than the control group. If you constantly monetize every spare minute, youre never actually bored. And boredom is where imagination lives. That weird doodle you sketched with no intent? Thats the raw creative energy that gets buried under business plans. Schedule screen-free drift time and let your mind wander. Building identity beyond output When you tie your identity to what you produce (and sell), it becomes scary to try new things. Pew Research shows about 39% of U.S. workers say their job is very important to their sense of self, so turning every hobby into a side gig only tightens the knot. But when you do things just because you like them, you can explore more freely. You get to be a person, not a brand. Youre experiencing what it means to be a human, not a highlight reel. Late capitalism might want you to think your value is in your productivity. But your joy? Your weird hobbies? Your unmonetizable talents? They deserve to exist without pressure. Not everything needs to be a startup. Some things are beautiful just because you made them, and thats more than enough. Final thought The algorithm will keep whispering that every pastime could be extra income, but the math rarely favors joy. A $200-a-month side gig that commandeers your evenings and fuels burnout isnt a wealth hack but an energy drain. Guard one corner of life thats gloriously unoptimized. In that sandbox, your mind refuels, new ideas gestate, and self-worth stays independent of clicks or cash flow. Ironically, keeping some pursuits priceless may just be the most profitable move you make.
Category:
E-Commerce
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